Le merveilleux acteur

Quand intelligence et sensibilité sont en parfait équilibre, on a le merveilleux acteur //
When intelligence and sensitivity are in perfect balance, we have the most wonderful actor

Today’s prompt is “actor”, acteur.

The original English version of the quote, supposedly by Charlie Chaplin, once again proves to be somewhat elusive. He might have said something similar, of course.

The cat always wanted to be an actor. He also has great balance of intelligence and sensitivity. What he lacks is the slim stature of Charlie Chaplin, but hey, he did his best.

In quarantine news, nothing major once again. The stats keep being tentatively optimistic for Spain in general, even more so for Canaries. Yesterday, as a sign of “life returning back to normal” we got two guys with a jackhammer under our window, breaking the surface of the little side street and leaving droppings of traffic cones in their wake. I’m sure it is a positive sign, although it is kinda difficult to perceive it as one.

Conseil sans assistance

Conseil sans assistance est un corps sans âme // Advice without help is a body without a soul

Today’s prompt is “assistance”, which is the same word in French.
The quote is a French proverb.
I am not sure why the cat is carrying a log. Maybe, but not necessarily, because I’ve read too many jokes about Lenin and a log recently.
Projecting on our current circumstances, the unhelpful advisers in the picture probably don’t have any choice. Social interaction of any kind is forbidden, so they can’t just come down from their balconies and help him to log the log, so to speak.
In quarantine news, the government plan of opening up was revealed yesterday. There are five steps in it, numbered, just for the heck of it, from 0 to 4 (errm). The positive thing is that three of the Canary Islands with the best stats can proceed to the stage one (not 0) almost immediately. The negative thing is that we don’t live on one of them. The walkies and individual sports are tentatively scheduled for this Saturday, as far as I can tell. The reporting of the news is on its new low at the moment, nobody seems to check what they are publishing, and cut and haste mistakes abound.

Les plus belles agences de voyage au monde

Alors... Où pourrais-je voyager aujourd’hui? // So... where could I travel today?

Today’s prompt is “agency”, agence.

The quote by Bernard Pivot that inspired the pic goes as follows:

Les dictionnaires sont les plus belles agences de voyage au monde.

Dictionaries are the most beautiful travel agencies in the world.

I sort of understand what Bernard Pivot meant, but right now it sounds rather ironic, if not sarcastic. The answer to the cat’s rhetorical question is, of course “nowhere” (nulle part). But let’s just pretend he can, shall we?

In quarantine news, nothing major. There is one strange thing though. Over the last few days Spanish media keep reporting substantial drop in “bad” part of epidemic statistics and emphasise the “good” one, while the WHO is showing some really quite strange stats in their reports. Due to change of report procedure, one hopes. Also, having botched both the return of least skilled workers after Easter and the kids-walking business, they now seem to want to keep the rest of us staying at home forever. It’s not major of course, just the normal operation.

Mais je n’ai même pas acheté d’œufs!

Mais je n’ai même pas acheté d’œufs! // But I didn’t even buy any eggs!

Today’s prompt is “grocery”, épicerie.

The quote that served as an inspiration for the pic goes as follows:

Quand le fond d’un sac d’épicerie se fend, c’est toujours celui qui contient les oeufs.

When <the bottom of> a grocery bag splits, it’s always the one that has the eggs.

The statement is a very narrow example of Sod’s law, which is similar to Murphy’s law, except of course it was known long before Murphy was born. Strangely, Wikipedia doesn’t have a page on the Russian version of the same law — «закон подлости».

In quarantine news, yesterday Spanish kids were allowed to finally come out to walk in the street. The rules for these walks are supposedly simple and quite strict, and don’t allow for contact (and virus transfer) between kids from different families.

Well, guess what. It didn’t happen quite as planned. Of course entire families came out for walkies, and stayed out all day. Social networks exploded with photos and videos of people breaking the rules (also of course). I am happy to say that the most obnoxious examples were few, although they were propagated ad nauseam. Today, I expect a wave of memes based on the events of yesterday. Otherwise, no change, not for us at any rate. Still stuck at home.

Ok... et comment installer ce... zoom?

Ok... et comment installer ce... Zoom? // Ok... and how do I install this... Zoom?

Today’s prompt is “dad”, papa.

The quote by Michel Serres that inspired the image goes like this:

La science, c’est ce que le père enseigne à son fils. La technologie, c’est ce que le fils enseigne à son papa.

Science is what the father teaches his son. Technology is what the son teaches his dad.

Nuff said.

In quarantine news — kids are finally allowed to walk a bit, starting today, between 9 am and 9 pm. Always with adults, can’t walk more than 1 km from their home, no more than one hour, once a day, and the beaches and walled parks are still closed, but this is good news anyway.

Everybody seemed to expect a big wave of kids dragging their parents in tow splashing out of the houses at 9 am exactly. Tell you what, didn’t happen. Dog-walkers were out, kids no. Of course parents might wish to sleep in and/or spend their one hour out later. Still, curious.

C’est toujours le joueur le plus mauvais

C’est toujours le joueur le plus mauvais qui a la balle // It is always the worst player who has the ball

Today’s prompt is “player”, joueur.

The supposed Murphy’s law in the caption once again stubbornly refuses to be found in its original form. I guess somebody simply extended classic Peter Principle that “each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and then remains there” to ball games.

Obviously, the cat is not the worst player, he just refuses to follow the stupid rules imposed on him. He is quite happy playing his own game.

In quarantine news, the consideration of Canaries’ own de-quaranteening schedule was postponed by the central government. From what I can read, they, firstly, refuse to swap their own proposals, however badly thought through, to someone else’s (which is also less than perfect). Secondly, they seem to be generally reluctant to relinquish the grip they currently have on everything.

Le plus dur dans une relation, c’est de partager le silence

Le plus dur dans une relation, c’est de partager le silence // The hardest part of a relationship is sharing the silence

Today’s prompt is “relationship”, relation.

The quote above belongs to David Foenkinos, French author and screenwriter. Tell you what — it’s kind of true for extroverts. Introverts might disagree. For them (or should I say, us), the most difficult part of anything is to find that silence to share. Or at least to find a place where the noise is created by us, not by other people. That is to say, listening to our own music is fine. Being force-fed somebody else’s music is not. And if the alien music is bad, Spanish shame kicks in. Balcony-bound extroverts, please take note.

Anyway. Canaries are proposing their own schedule of coming out of quarantine, being the least affected autonomous community of Spain. The proposal, which is released via mass media, has some very interesting parts in it — like for example that one day people from houses with odd numbers can come out, the other day — with even ones. I mean, huh? I don’t even have a document where it says which number I live in... Oh well. As the example with kids shows, best to wait a few days before things become clearer.

Votez pour miaou

Votez pour miaou. Le candidat le plus honnête // Vote for meow. The most honest candidate

Today I am starting with my second batch of randomly generated prompt. Yes, obviously, we are still in quarantine.

The first prompt is “candidate”, candidat.

The cat is presenting his candidature for some elections. He promises unlimited meows any time of day, especially when he is hungry. Some purring and sitting in boxes is also included into his program. It’s a very short program really.

He is the most honest candidate, that’s why.

Je veux quitter le club!

Je veux quitter le club // I want to leave the club (I want to quit the gym)

Today’s, and the last in the batch, prompt is “membership”, appartenance / adhésion.

In out evenings in, which are basically all of them right now, we are watching Friends. By a strange coincidence, we watched yesterday the episode where Chandler wishes to quit the gym he never goes to and takes Ross with him for moral support. What with the fitness theme from yesterday, the prompt was quite easy to interpret.

In quarantine news, Spanish government announced yesterday that kids will be able to finally get out of their houses to (attention!) accompany their adults to supermarkets, pharmacies, and banks. Also go to workplaces and to care for elderly relatives. Total chaos ensued. In a few hours they backed off, explaining that that’s not what they meant. What did they mean is still a mystery, but in any case it looks like a lapsus of most spectacular kind.

We have two or three explanations. One is that it was a cut&haste error, i.e. somebody just applied what adults can do to kids. Two, that it was a strategy of “put a goat in the house with you”, “and now, take him out of the house”, i.e. first make conditions insane and unbearable, make everybody feel the pain and then retrieve the pain. (This is probably too clever). Third, there is a fifth column acting in clandestine. If so, they are successful. Even I went into “what kind of shit do they smoke there?” mode, and we don’t even have small kids.

Allez, tu peux le faire!

Allez! Tu peux le faire! // C’mon, you can do it

Today’s (and penultimate already!) prompt is application.

And here is the cat trying to do a pull-up (traction), urged on by his especially annoying personal trainer app.

Not sure how he got up there. We know he can jump but I doubt he can jump with such precision.

In other news, the officials are now discussing letting us out to exercise in fresh air. They are pondering how to make it as uncomfortable as possible (“Should we make them all wear masks all the time? Should we keep open spaces off bounds? We can’t watch them there, you know...”). That can take a while.

Il y a des règles, mais...

Il y a des règles, mais les gens trouvent toujours moyen de les contourner... Un vrai dirigeant doit le comprendre. //
There are rules, but people always find a way around them. A true leader must understand this.

Today’s prompt is “leadership”, leadership / direction / dirigeants.

Ever since the quarantine began to hit Europe, there has been a lot of jokes going around about people circumventing the rules in various ways, some of them quite funny and talented. Come to think of it, there were probably as many jokes in Asia, it’s just that we are less likely to see them.

Anyway, it is inevitable that this happens. I find the quote above very appropriate for the situation.

Here is the cat going for a walk. Unlike dogs, cats are not on the list of privileged who can walk in the street you see, and he felt really stressed between four walls. Judging by his furtive look, he is fully aware he is in breach of quarantine rules, but, well, see the quote above.

Peindre du blanc sur du blanc

On ne peut pas peindre du blanc sur du blanc, du noir sur du noir. Chacun a besoin de l’autre pour se révéler //
You can’t paint white on white, black on black. Each needs the other to reveal themselves

Today’s prompt is “requirement”, exigence / besoin.

The quote is apparently an African proverb. Little did they know about Kazimir Malevich and his White on White painting.

To be honest, I forgot about it too. Black Square is something that immediately comes to mind, of course, but White on White was gone, maybe due to the lack of contrast. Interestingly, Google and its Big Brother information processing strategies proved quite helpful. How. Well, first I searched for the citation and found one I liked. I stuck it into Google Translate. Then, thinking that Black Square will be the perfect illustration, I started typing Kazimir Malevich in Google search box. To my surprise, the suggestion of Google was not “black square” but rather “white on white”. Well done I guess, but hmmm...

In other news, looks like at least the kids till age of 12 will be able to have a walk outside starting from 27 April. Yay for them. Meh for us.

Une dette est belle par son paiement

Une dette est belle par son paiement // Долг платежом красен

Today’s prompt is “payment”, paiement.

I had difficulties with this one. Now we are sitting at home, with no ways of generating income, thoughts of various payments that are due are looming menacingly, making it difficult to stay positive and draw something positive, too.

So, here is not-so-positive pic. The cat will be fine though, if he owns anything to anybody, he owns it to me, and I am not going to claim anything off him. He is a good cat.

The quote of today is a Russian proverb. As usual, I couldn’t identify the original immediately, but at least I could do it eventually in this case. The literal meaning is “The debt is good by its payment”. Originally coined by merchants to underscore the practice of lending with interest, so that the debt is made “good” by giving back more when you borrowed, now it is used more or less to say “you get what you give”.

Mais nous avons les deux!

Le paradis pour le climat, l’enfer pour la compagnie? Mais nous avons les deux! //
Heaven for climate, hell for company? But we have both!

Today’s prompt is “climate”, climat.

The quote belong to Mark Twain again, although, according to Quote Investigator, some people said it before him.

Here is the cat, inviting your to visit Canary Islands once it’s all over. We have both the climate fit for paradise and quite exceptionally good company. Judging from the view behind him, the cat is hiking somewhere close to Pico de Las Nieves on Gran Canaria.

Une tablette au fort pourcentage de cacao

Je ne connais rien de plus érotique qu’une tablette au fort pourcentage de cacao //
I know of nothing more erotic than a bar with a high percentage of cocoa

Today’s prompt is “percentage”, pourcentage.

The picture above is a reference to an illustration on the merits of bittersweet chocolate in the excellent book on chocolate by Sandra Boynton.

I am not entirely sure what sort of emotions the cat is experiencing, having bitten into a bar with, presumably, a very high content of cocoa. But it is certainly looks like a revelation of some kind.

Les gens heureux

Les gens heureux n’ont pas besoin de se presser //
Happy people don’t have to hurry

Today’s prompt is “people”, gens.

The quote above is apparently a Chinese proverb, although I am not convinced. «Счастливые часов не наблюдают» by Griboyedov expresses much the same sentiment, and I am sure many more expressions saying basically the same exist.

The cat is sunbathing on Las Canteras, Las Palmas main town beach. Being an intellectual, he is also reading a very clever book.

L’audition très sélective

Non, tu ne peux pas manger une autre glace → Tu peux manger une autre glace. Ou trois! //
No, you can’t have another ice-cream! → You can have another ice-cream. Or three!

Today’s prompt is “hearing”, audition/ouïe.

I found a quote of uncertain origin, that is to say, the quote is attributed to various authors, but it always states the same — don’t bother explaining too much, people only hear what they want to hear.

Here is the cat in his childhood demonstrating very, but very selective hearing. Maybe even imaginative.

Le chat dans l’isolement

Le chat dans l’isolement // The cat in isolation

Today’s prompt is quite tricky to illustrate for me — “county”, comté. I didn’t really know what to draw.

Why oh why was it not, say, easily illustrated “kingdom”?

I don’t know enough French to play with words, so please don’t judge too harshly my attempt at word-forming. The cat’s place is called “Monchaté” and he is self-isolating in it.

His pose and the view from above makes me think that he is being observed from a helicopter of Guardia Civil or something. Maybe they are checking if he is self-isolating properly.

They do that, you know. Last week there was a widely-reported incident of one of their helicopters landing next to a beach where they spotted a woman breaking the quarantine conditions. There was even a photo of one of the guards talking to the said woman — young, blond, slim, tanned and wearing skimpy shorts. Don’t know what to add to it. Ah yes — they let her off with a caution, AFAIK.

Quand on allume une cigarette

Quand on allume une cigarette sur un quai de métro ou en attendant un bus, il arrive //
When you light a cigarette on a subway platform or while waiting for a bus, it arrives

Today’s prompt is cigarette.

The quote above is supposedly one of the Murphy’s laws or maybe a corollary. Much shorter and helpful version is “If you want your bus to arrive, light a cigarette”.

BTW, the cat doesn’t smoke, he is just trying to conjure one of the municipal buses, or guaguas, of Las Palmas.

Une belle figure

Une belle figure porte avec soi sa recommandation // A beautiful figure brings its recommendation with it

Today’s prompt is “recommendation”, recommandation.

The quote above belongs to Publilius Syrus and demonstrates that the halo effect was known for more or less always.

As far as I can see the closest English translation is “A fair exterior is a silent recommendation” although I can’t tell you where the “silent” bit came from. Or where it went in the French variant.

The cat, as cats in general, knows of the importance of fair exterior. Look at him there. Admire his toga. Wearing a toga is tricky when you have no shoulders, but he managed it with his usual grace.

In other news, nothing changes, still sitting there, watching the spring run by.

Les vêtements sont un message

Les vêtements sont un message // The clothes are a message

Today’s prompt is message, written the same in English and French.

The full citation goes like so:

Les vêtements sont un message, un reflet de la personnalité, de la situation sociale, de l’éducation et l’image que chacun de nous veut renvoyer au reste du monde.

The clothes are a message, a reflection of the personality, of the social situation, of the education and the image that we want to send to the world.

It comes from Leaving the World by Douglas Kennedy and I couldn’t find the English original, so it might differ from the translation above.

The cat always wanted to be a cowcat. Occasionally, he puts on his hat, takes his lasso and poses against the sunset, just to send a message.

Beaucoup de patience

Le chat a beaucoup de patience // The cat has a lot of patience

Today’s prompt is patience, written the same in English and in French.

Pronunciation, however, is very different. Russian word «пасьянс», card game for one involving extracting order out of chaos, has its origin in French pronunciation. The games of this type, however, are not French but rather Scandinavian or German. Makes sense, the longer, darker and lonelier winter evenings you have, the more likely you are to invent such pastime.

In other news, our quarantine is prolonged till 26 April as a minimum. My list of prompts doesn’t go that far, so I will need to generate some more.

Ceux qui t’entourent

Ceux qui t’entourent, s’ils chantent leur chanson, chante-la avec eux (ou non) //
If those around you sing their song, sing it with them (or not)

Today’s prompt is “song”, chanson.

I think that when the quote was originally written, said or otherwise uttered, the utterer didn’t consider that the song could be an abomination. What if it happened to be Despacito or something?

Poor cat. He doesn’t enjoy it at all.

L’enfance a ses odeurs

L’enfance a ses odeurs // Childhood has its smells

Today’s prompt is childhood, enfance.

The original quote is by Jean Cocteau and he quite likely meant something horrible, but since the quote stops where it does, I prefer to interpret it my way.

The cat also prefers to concentrate on all things nice. Here he is, smelling cornflowers, bleuets, in the field of his childhood. Let him be, he looks happy.

Ceux qui réfléchissent

La vision de ceux qui réfléchissent // The vision of those who think

Today’s prompt is engineering, ingénierie. By now I am having serious doubts in the randomness of the random word list I’ve generated but never mind, let’s move on.

The quote belongs to Sheldon Cooper of The Big Bang Theory series. I knew he was bound to have said a lot of funny things about engineering. Here it is in its fullness:

L’ingénierie... Là où les braves tâcherons exécutent la vision de ceux qui réfléchissent et ont un rêve. Bonjour les hoompa-loompas de la science!

Engineering. Where the noble semi-skilled labourers execute the vision of those who think and dream. Hello, oompah-loompahs of science.

The cat is admiring the Betancourt machine, as found in the Elder Museum of Science and Technology in Las Palmas de Gran Canaria. I think he is quite impressed and doesn’t share Sheldon’s opinion of engineering at all.

Au sens large

Le chat aux pommes // The cat with apples

Today’s prompt is “ratio” – rapport or ratio in French.

Wikipedia says, confusingly:

En mathématiques et en sciences, un rapport est au sens large synonyme de la notion de ratio...

(In maths and science, «rapport» is, in a general sense, a synonym of the concept of the ratio...)

Sooo, rapport and ratio are the same, except maybe different, and my currently shitty internet connection doesn’t allow to figure out what is the difference, if any.

The cat is engaged in culinary, the most precise of all sciences, with the possible exception of botany. I remember being struck by absence of preciseness in the recipes which kept saying “pinch”, “cup” and “to taste”. I know that at least “cup” is something that is standardised, more or less, although differently in different countries. But “pinch”, “on the end of a knife” and similarly precise measures will always introduce some individuality into the simplest of dishes.

By the way, looks like he is making a “sharlotka”, a simple apple cake, very tasty, easy to make and highly recommended.

Dans une bouteille de vin

Ily a plus de philosophie dans une bouteille de vin que dans tous les livres //
There is more philosophy in a bottle of wine than in all the books

Today’s prompt is philosophy, philosophie.

The quote above is attributed to Louis Pasteur, and for a good reason (which can’t be said of many famous quotes). He wrote something not quite dissimilar in a private letter, nowhere as sweeping. But it is a nice sentence and the cat seems to be in full agreement with it, so... Here is the cat, enjoying his bottle and making good use of philosophy books too. Nicely balanced, as always.

La possession

La possession est une amitié entre le chat et les choses // Possession is a friendship between the cat and things

Well, the original quote by Jean-Paul Sartre talks about l’homme, the man, but who cares. Not I.

Today’s prompt is “possession” written the same in both French and English.

In other news, the authorities are discussing possibly letting people to come out to exercise and walk their kids. Which is good news, up to now kids had less rights than dogs or even the adults who could at least come out to buy stuff. Fingers crossed.

Mon opinion

C’est mon opinion et je la partage // That’s my opinion and I share it

The cat, being stuck indoors for nearly three weeks, grew a bit peculiar. He seems to be preaching stuff from his balcony. I am sure he will be fine once let out though.

French partager and English “share” have the same glorious ambiguity built-in. That is to say that “sharing an opinion” can mean both tell somebody what said opinion is and be of the same opinion with somebody.

I am happy to report that our neighbours are mostly OK, balcony-etiquette-wise. Apart from a little speech through the loudspeaker somebody gave on one of the first day of the confinement, hijacking the daily “emergency applause” and quite, quite terrible go at We are the champions by another, I have nothing to complain about.

While it is very nice to see Italians singing and playing music from their balconies, I imagine it could be quite taxing to have a neighbour who is prone to emitting loud noise of whatever kind on a regular basis.

Trois choses

Il y a trois choses qu’une femme est capable de réaliser avec rien: un chapeau, une salade et une scène de ménage. (Pas Mark Twain) //
There are three things a woman can make out of nothing: a hat, a salad and a scene. (Not Mark Twain)

Today’s prompt is “scene”, scène.

Some sites attribute the phrase above to Mark Twain. Some others claim that he never said that. What with internet connection being slow and unreliable at the moment, I can’t really tell.

I feel we have to note two things about the cat though. First, he appears to have a woman in his life. Second, he is more well-read than I thought — he knows the quote.