Alors, vous parlez français?

ça va? -- Alors, vous parlez français? --Non, mais je peux dire "ça va?" // How are you? -- So, you speak French? --N o, but I can say "how are you?" :))

Yesterday on a hike (une randonnée) with Arawak there was a French guy who speaks very little Spanish (He might well speak perfect English, but I didn't ask). At some point, when we were trudging up a slope, I asked him how he was doing (ça va?). He asked if I spoke French, and, lamely, I replied "yes, a little" (oui, un peu). 

Later I thought that Non, mais je peux dire "ça va?" would have been somewhat less  lame, and also more truthful, thus showing L'esprit de l'escalier. 

In Russian, this "staircase wit" will be"задний ум" - sort of "back mind", or even "back brain", like what the dinosaurs (not) used to have.